Well how am I nicer to myself? How can I be kinder to myself you might think?
One place to start is your inner dialogue and the things you say out loud about yourself.
All the times you are beating yourself up because the result you got wasn’t good enough is an opportunity to be kind to yourself.
“I didn’t stand up for myself again, what’s wrong with me?”, or the classic “It’s just not good enough”.
How often do you hear yourself explaining or just telling other people those things that go on inside of you? “I need to…..”, or “I should have….”?
As humans we have the capability to look back into the past and think about the future. I call it our blessing AND our curse. You might see how you could have done things better, but only after you did it! You don’t know what you don’t know! Let me repeat that; You don’t know what you don't know.
The inability to forgive yourself, because you did the best that you could in the situation and 5 minutes, 5 hours or 5 months later proved that you could have handled that differently most likely with a better outcome, is NOT serving you.
You have to do something - take action - to figure out your next step. You can’t succeed without failing! You wouldn’t know what succeeding felt like if you hadn’t felt like a failure before. You wouldn’t know how it feels for everything to run smoothly if you haven’t had the opposite experience.
So whenever I feel like I should have done better I very quickly stop and think; “Hmm….I wonder why I didn’t? Obviously that was what made sense to me at the time and I know that I am exactly where I’m supposed to be. I know what I want and I know I’m worthy of it - we are all worthy. So I’m gonna stop myself; my negative tirade against myself and know that I’m doing the very best that I can in each and every moment”.
Of course you have to do your very best in every moment and if you too many times see yourself repeating the same mistake over and over again you need to do something about that.
You need to think and behave differently to get a different outcome.
If you’re reading this I’m sure you already know but we all need a reminder once in a while. Why I love writing these blog posts. Huge big reminders to myself - and I love to write too. And practice my English writing skills as I’m not a native speaker.
I hope this gave you a bit of inspiration to how you can be kinder to yourself because the world needs it.